It’s crazy how you can want a small wedding, but when you put pen to paper and think about who you both want to be there, you somehow end up with close to 100 names (or more) on your list.
I’m so thankful my parents are not trying to invite people to the wedding- I hear that used to be very common (and still happens to some degree!). This makes sense if we recall that until very recently marriage was basically a business transaction between families; love never factored into the equation.
Can you invite your sweet Aunt, but not your grouchy Uncle? What about your hilarious, but alcoholic, co-worker who tends to embarrass himself at functions? Will your friends be upset that you invite them only for the evening and not the ceremony and dinner, to keep your food costs down?
Making the guest list comes in second to venue hunting as the most stressful thing newly engaged couples have to do at the beginning of their wedding planning. Take your time. Re-write the list 10 times, it’s ok. See who consistently is in the top 30, and who is added towards the end. Be realistic about who will come, and be honest with yourselves about who you really want to attend.
It’s hard not to get sucked in by family pressure, wedding etiquette “rules”, but if you stick to your guns and only invite those you love, not who you feel obligated to include, and the number that you can afford, the end result will surely be more pleasant for everyone. I know that our guest list will continue to shape-shift, and won’t be set in stone until we mail out the invitations.
Then there is the concern over paper. I for one am an avid recycler, and I don’t want to have a wasteful wedding. Thankfully, “eco-weddings” are a new tradition in the making and there are a lot of resources online and in your library to help you make responsible choices.
My partner and I are committed to using enviromentally-friendly paper for our invites. Thankfully, through greatgreenwedding I discovered Sweet Invitations. Not only are they local (Vancouver, BC) and use tree-free recycled cotton and silk paper, they are so far the most affordable option!!
I will soon receive my sample invitation in the mail, I can’t wait. While we won’t be making a final decision until February or March, I am definitely leaning towards this local, home-based, earth-friendly company.