What I hear over and over again from newlywed brides is that try as they might, the months leading up to the wedding were some of the most stressful in their lives; putting strain on their relationships and not letting them ‘enjoy the ride’ to the altar, so to speak. Many of those woman, wiser now, advise us fledglings to not sweat the small stuff, give the wedding obsession a break now and again, don’t freak out on family and friends and damage those relationships, and remember to make quality time for you and your fiance to keep the love burning.
Since I know that I have stress-ball tendencies, I wanted to take all that advice to heart and ensure that we remained as happy and blissfully in love along the nuptial road as we were the day we got engaged. (sigh) Easier said than done.
For a little insight into our lives, we are both university students going to school full-time and working part-time. As you can imagine, this 6-day-a-week schedule is pretty hectic, and on its own could cause duress on an individual and a couple. Add in all the extra hours that go into planning your own wedding plus the unexpected things that life throws your way, and I was getting fairly uptight.
Last week, on an ordinary Tuesday morning, I was surprised by a delivery of flowers at the office where I’m interning. To my delight, my fiance had sent it, just because, with a little note saying “From the one who loves you most, I’m so proud of you!”
She said it was a multi-functional gift: to celebrate a recent accomplishment in my performing career, to congratulate me on landing the internship I wanted for my next semester, and in sympathy for my Grandfather recently passing away. “And also just to remind you how much I love you.”
I was so moved by her gesture, as I often am by her generosity and kindness. Not to brag, but my girl really raises the bar when it comes to romance and considerate actions every day. In the three and a half years that we have been together, I have been her willing pupil as she has trained me in how to express love and care in a very tangible, and consistent, way.
For instance, last winter I was working a receptionist job that I hated. Not a morning person at the best of times, I was such a grouch being forced to get up at 6 am to go to that horrible place. Every day she would bring me tea, wake me with kisses, and have my lunch made for me. And every day, there was a little love note inside to brighten my mood. Really, who does that?! 🙂
“In April we’ll be finished school and start working and everything will be different” has become a sort of mantra in our household, repeated to bring comfort that positive change is on its way. Sadly, it’s too easy to get caught up in all your to-dos and deadlines and busy schedule that we forget to take a moment to acknowledge our loved ones and let them know how much they mean to us.
It’s little things like this that keep the romance alive. No matter how obsessed or stressed I get with planning our wedding, I know she will be there to bring me back to reality and remember why we are doing this in the first place: if you like it, then you better put a ring on it. LOL! So true, Beyonce! And hey, have you noticed how her name rhymes with fiance? Hmmmm…
How are you and your hubby-to-be staying sane through the planning process? Share your cute, lovey-dovey stories!