Stupid things people say when you’re pregnant

angry pregnant
Seriously, what is with some people? No social filter, I guess, or a complete lack of how their comments could be misconstrued or offend.

When I was newly pregnant I heard the tales of un-asked-for birth terror stories and belly touching from strangers, and friends and family rudely asking “was it planned?” Thing is, I never experienced any of that. Obviously, when there’s two Moms, and we are married and very much in love, people don’t ask if it was planned. They take it one step further and inquire “so how did that happen?” Ummm…

Now, if you’re a close friend or a relative, I might feel comfortable telling you. But my Boss? Or, how about the stranger at the grocery store, who thinks because her nephew is gay she’s “cool enough” to ask? Sheesh.

And what’s with people wanting to guess the sex of the baby, or ask if you have names picked out already? I find it all very amusing. My wife and I decided to find out (mostly because we felt SO strongly we were having a boy- and we were right!) and so we have told everyone. But names? No way. Private information until the baby arrives safely air-side, people.

Then there’s your weight, which suddenly because you’re carrying a child is OK to discuss? Wrong. Never venture that a pregnant woman must be ready to ‘pop’- because she might still be months away from full term. And it is never funny to joke, “Are you sure there’s only one in there?”
seriously-wtf

Lastly, why is everyone so hung up on this due date thing anyway? It’s really just an estimate. Approximately 50% of pregnancies end before, and 50% after. Best piece of advice I got early on was to NEVER tell anyone your actual, 40 week due date. Be vague, just say the month, or downright LIE and tell people 2 weeks later than it is. Trust me.

I honestly think that the due date should be 42 weeks, like a “best before” or expiry date- since then and only then should people start to get concerned. Right? Where can I make an official complaint?

All this negative stuff aside, I have also discovered a rarely-talked-about perk of pregnancy: panhandlers don’t ask me for change anymore. I guess even they can draw the line somewhere, which, I think, is great. I also love knowing that good manners aren’t completely dead when people offer me their seat on public transit.

So, I won’t be pregnant much longer. Then I’ll get to enjoy unsolicited parenting advice. Oh joy!

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