My Belly Button Will Never Be The Same – A Pregnancy Poem

tenmonths

We prayed for you to come our way
didn’t know your face but knew your name
How quickly you answered our call that day
and my belly button will never be the same

I endured leg cramps, heart burn, and feeling sick
Watched my body change from the inside out
Indescribable magic, feeling you twist and kick
My love for you was never in doubt

Overdue by two weeks, you made us wait
Finally one night I felt the pain
So excited, a bit scared, such a state!
It was a stormy Equinox with wind and rain

24 hours later and not as planned
You came into this world screaming strong
Euphoric joy now that you were safe on “land”
and you were healthy and nothing was wrong

So many tears and so many smiles
in the short weeks since you came
a deeper love than we have ever known
and my belly button will never be the same

Stupid things people say when you’re pregnant

angry pregnant
Seriously, what is with some people? No social filter, I guess, or a complete lack of how their comments could be misconstrued or offend.

When I was newly pregnant I heard the tales of un-asked-for birth terror stories and belly touching from strangers, and friends and family rudely asking “was it planned?” Thing is, I never experienced any of that. Obviously, when there’s two Moms, and we are married and very much in love, people don’t ask if it was planned. They take it one step further and inquire “so how did that happen?” Ummm…

Now, if you’re a close friend or a relative, I might feel comfortable telling you. But my Boss? Or, how about the stranger at the grocery store, who thinks because her nephew is gay she’s “cool enough” to ask? Sheesh.

And what’s with people wanting to guess the sex of the baby, or ask if you have names picked out already? I find it all very amusing. My wife and I decided to find out (mostly because we felt SO strongly we were having a boy- and we were right!) and so we have told everyone. But names? No way. Private information until the baby arrives safely air-side, people.

Then there’s your weight, which suddenly because you’re carrying a child is OK to discuss? Wrong. Never venture that a pregnant woman must be ready to ‘pop’- because she might still be months away from full term. And it is never funny to joke, “Are you sure there’s only one in there?”
seriously-wtf

Lastly, why is everyone so hung up on this due date thing anyway? It’s really just an estimate. Approximately 50% of pregnancies end before, and 50% after. Best piece of advice I got early on was to NEVER tell anyone your actual, 40 week due date. Be vague, just say the month, or downright LIE and tell people 2 weeks later than it is. Trust me.

I honestly think that the due date should be 42 weeks, like a “best before” or expiry date- since then and only then should people start to get concerned. Right? Where can I make an official complaint?

All this negative stuff aside, I have also discovered a rarely-talked-about perk of pregnancy: panhandlers don’t ask me for change anymore. I guess even they can draw the line somewhere, which, I think, is great. I also love knowing that good manners aren’t completely dead when people offer me their seat on public transit.

So, I won’t be pregnant much longer. Then I’ll get to enjoy unsolicited parenting advice. Oh joy!

How much does it really cost to have a baby?

image from thefiscaltimes.com

image from thefiscaltimes.com


The answer to this question is, of course, subjective. There are basics that you will need, but every parent-to-be is going to spend a different amount, depending on their income, location, and personal preferences.

Since my personal preference is to be as frugal as possible without compromising quality (or style), second-hand items in good condition are the way to go. Which is great since so many people have wanted to GIFT us baby items! We were told this would happen, but my wife and I were taken aback (and still are) by everyone’s generosity. And not just friends and family — even practical strangers, friends of friends! It’s been a wonderful blessing and we have gratefully accepted nearly everything offered to us.

Early on, before I got pregnant, we made a budget (because that’s the kind of couple we are). We estimated how much we could save in the next 10 months to a year, to be ready for my loss of income and the increased expenses. Well, since I got pregnant right away, we lost a bit of that time to save, and of course unexpected things came up (like me having to pay back the government my GST credit, since my marital status changed. ouch!) so we haven’t quite reached our goal — but we’ve come pretty darn close!

Here’s a breakdown of what we’ve already spent:
$200 on maternity clothes (more than I wanted or budgeted to spend, but a life-saver!)
$100 on nursery items and decor
$200 on a stroller (from Craigslist)
$125 on our Doula deposit (we’ll owe another $125 after the birth)
$250 on the birthing tub rental (a necessary luxury for a home birth)
$55 on our prenatal classes (thanks goodness for sliding scale!)
$60 on a glider and ottoman (from Craigslist)

For a total of $990! Amazing since we budgeted to spend $1000 to get ready for baby.

Since we pretty much have everything that we need to get started, we won’t be buying anything else until after our baby showers. Fingers crossed that people get us gifts from our registry — the items we really need (no more onesies or receiving blankets! Lol!). Btw, I set up our registry through babyli.st and it’s awesome.

Another way we’ve saved money is by using our PC points to shop at Superstore. We use our PC Financial Mastercard to buy groceries every month, and once or twice a year we get to go shopping for free with the points!

For now we’ve saved enough to live on despite my loss of income and the meager maternity benefits I’ll be getting. I’m so thankful to live in Canada where we have federal maternity benefits! I know that having a child will just get more and more expensive as they grow older, eat more, take lessons and play sports, etc, but at least we can enjoy our baby’s arrival without stressing over money. Thanks Mom, for teaching me to be thrifty!

Starting a family

Hello! I know I haven’t posted in a while, sorry about that! I’ve been kinda busy… being pregnant.
baby bump
Yes, it’s true. I’m knocked up, preggers, in the family way, got a bun in the oven. Whatever euphemism you prefer, come September, my wife and I will have a baby!!

It’s amazing to have planned this for so long and have it come true so quickly (we conceived our first month trying!). Our families are thrilled. I had nausea in the beginning, but I’ve been feeling really good for the last few months.

Being the practical gal that I am, we timed it so it wouldn’t conflict with my summer work. We are saving as much money as we can to be able to pay for prenatal classes, buy baby things, and have funds to live on before my benefits kick in- which aren’t very much anyway. Things will be tight over the Fall and Winter, but ultimately we know that we’ll be ok and we are too excited to worry too much at this point!

We have the advantage of having planned to get pregnant, so we’ve had lots of time to have all the big discussions and really decide whether or not we wanted to start a family. At 35, I feel like the timing is perfect for me. I’m ready!

We told our parents in a really cute way, by making cards.
grandparents_cardsFor once, my Mom was speechless. Lol!

After we were past the first trimester, when it’s considered “safe” to tell more people, we sent out a mass email to our extended family and friends.
thrilledtoannouncegrowingbytwofeetwelcometotheworldWe got a great response from everyone- it’s so wonderful to feel all the love and support!

So in case you’re worried wondering if this will turn into just another “Mommy blog”… well, don’t fear! While Motherhood will obviously become my main focus, I still want to discuss other things and have an outlet for my varied passions. I’ve got a few months left to enjoy being child-less, and I’ll figure something out. Being the practical diva that I am, I always do.

Cheers!